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The Most Popular Blog Posts of 2021

See the top articles from the blog this year

Young couple looking at computer screen together

Here at The Gottman Institute, we are proud of the content and resources we provide to help you have a better relationship with your partner and your loved ones. This year millions of you came to The Gottman Relationship Blog to learn more about conflict management, staying connected, having better sex, and looking for the right partner. Check out our most popular blog posts of the year.

Red Flag/Green Flag: What to Look for When You’re Dating

When you’re dating, how can you tell if someone is right for you? In this article, Elizabeth Earnshaw offers the warning signs and positive traits you should look out for. “I believe you can use this… as early as the first date to start paying attention to whether or not you want to continue with the other person.”

How Do Affairs Happen?

Infidelity remains a difficult event to discuss whether you’re impacted by an affair as a couple or you’re the clinician helping them. Certified Gottman Therapist Jinashree Rajendrakumar points to the research to explain the origins of infidelity. If you’ve ever wondered what leads a partner to stray from their relationship, read more about the cascade of an affair.

4 Conflict Styles that Hurt Your Relationship

The Gottmans stand by the truth that conflict is inevitable in any relationship. How you argue is important to the overall health of your partnership. This article breaks down the ways that couples fight that are tell-tale signs of staying together or breaking up. Learn how to navigate conflict in a healthy way.

3 Ways to Make a Better Bid for Connection

Have you heard of “fuzzy bidding?” It’s that attempt to connect with your partner that falls flat because it’s not obvious enough. Don’t let a perfectly good moment to bond go to waste. Here are three simple tips on clear bids that make it easy for your partner to turn towards you.

Three Common Mistakes Couples Make During Conflict

Arguing all the time is exhausting. Often, couples make the same mistakes in conflict over and over again and stay in perpetual gridlock. Marital therapist Andrew G. Marshall helps you get to the root of what keeps you and your partner going in circles.

The Deeper Meaning of Trust

We know that trust is one of the pillars of the Sound Relationship House theory. Without it, a relationship is unsteady. But what is trust? How does it function between you and your partner and how does it help you as a couple? Gottman Method-trained therapist Genesis Games discusses what it means to trust each other and how it reinforces your commitment.

The Easiest Way to Improve Your Relationship

Did you know we make videos here at The Gottman Institute? Check out this special feature where you can see bids and “turning towards” illustrated in this popular YouTube clip.

How to Have a State of the Union Meeting

A “State of the Union” is not about politics. The Gottmans use this term to explain the very important conversation you and your partner need to have routinely to stay on track and stay connected every week. Certified Gottman Therapist Kimberly Panganiban explains this core Gottman concept.

How to Get in the Mood for Sex (Even When You Aren’t Feeling It)

When it comes to sex, we love Dr. Cheryl Fraser‘s witty, down-to-earth advice. In this blog post, she tells readers how to create sexual desire no matter how they feel. “One of the many beautiful aspects of long-term love is learning new ways to explore the dance of eroticism together. Don’t wait for passion. Instead, choose to become passion.”

Passion and Romance in Marriage: How It Goes Sour

A popular topic for our readers is what to do when you lose your spark. Certified Gottman Therapist Dr. Susan O’Grady shares ways to bring it back so that you both can feel nourished and refreshed.

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The Gottman Institute’s Editorial Team is composed of staff members who contribute to the Institute’s overall message. It is our mission to reach out to individuals, couples, and families in order to help create and maintain greater love and health in relationships.

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